The Greene Room

Breaking News: It's all relative

After watching in-depth coverage of each candidate's 9th cousin, three-times removed, I decided to conduct the first ever Greene Room poll:

17% of Democratic voters nationwide say that they will vote for Barack because he is a distant cousin of Brad Pitt - the Brad Factor is outpacing the Oprah Effect in bringing women voters to his campaign.

22% of Democrats support Hillary because Angelina Jolie is in her family tree - sources close to her campaign are urging Hillary to get lip injections to help male voters see more of a resemblance.

13% of voters will not vote for McCain because he has no celebrity relatives, but that's okay because 34% of Democrats who are still loyal to Jennifer Aniston will be voting for the Republican nominee.

Given the nature of the National Enquiresque-like coverage of the election, you never know what nonsense will be scrutinized for an entire day week. Let's see how much airtime the Clinton and Obama economic speeches will get today. What would happen if the media only covered the serious issues at stake, provided unbiased and accurate analysis of each candidate's experience and plans, or just simply stopped focusing on the inside baseball horserace angle? Oh yeah, Hillary would be the front-runner.

As MJ said, "I'm talking to the man woman in the mirror...," because I too am guilty of sensationalizing the race in some of my on-air commentary, but the first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem.

Crush on McCain

"What is a Senator like you doing in a place like this," is what I considered asking Sen. John McCain at Arianna Huffington's house when we first met in 2001. Instead, tears welled up in my eyes as I reached out to shake his hand and thanked him for his service to our country. The night "Funkmaster" McCain received the 2005 Rock the Nation award from Rock the Vote was one of my proudest moments. I may disagree with him on many issues, but McCain's comprehensive approach to immigration reform, commitment to a no torture policy, and revised position in support of national service have increased my respect for the politician with a reputation for taking "principled stands on tough issues."  Campaign woes aside, Sen. McCain's mix of straight talk and humor keeps things interesting as witnessed by his exchange with a high school student in New Hampshire yesterday where he jokingly ends a response to a question about his age with, "Thanks for the question, you little jerk....you're drafted." Jokes aside, Sen. McCain offered a much needed honest assessment to the students regarding the war:

He (McCain) explained why he was not shrinking from his support for a temporary increase of troops in Iraq and why students should pay attention. "If this war continues much longer, there will be people in this audience who will serve in the military, who also may be going over there (in Iraq) or to Afghanistan," McCain told them. He said they should watch the upcoming report on Iraq from Gen. David Petraeus. "It may be a seminal debate. It may be one of the most important debates in history and it may directly affect your lives," he warned.

Young voters deserve the face-time and the truth. Thanks for 'keeping it real', Sen. McCain. 

Thompson's Midnight Madness

Flashback to 1979 - a former movie star is the last Republican to jump into the presidential race. A year later he is elected President. Deja Vu - the water finally feels good, so Fred Thompson is jumping in.

If his acting credits count for experience, he has the rest of the Republican field beat. His film and television roles include: President, CIA Director, FBI Agent, District Attorney, White House Chief of Staff, Rear Admiral, Major General, and Lieutenant Colonel.

Former Sen. Fred Thompson will make it official tomorrow and start legitimately campaigning for the Republican nomination. Using a midnight madness strategy and all the media savvy he's garnered from appearing in 142 episodes of the Law and Order franchise, Thompson decided to skip the Fox News Channel debate on Wednesday and instead run an ad during the New Hampshire round-up. NBC will no longer air Law & Order episodes with Thompson appearing as D.A. Arthur Branch, but the network gets Thompson announcing on "The Tonight Show with Jay Leno" on Wednesday. Nothing is official until the clock strikes midnight when the segment with Leno airs and the video announcement goes up on his website. He gets to control his message and not bother with questions those pesky voters want answered.

As the Vote Rocks: Will Thompson's announcement persuade Newt to stay away? Will Thompson debate? Will Law & Order do one of their quasi "ripped from the headlines" episodes on him? Plot: A prosecutor-turned lobbyist-turned actor-turned Senator-turned actor-turned presidential candidate gets murdered. The initial suspect is the former NYC mayor, because his limelight was stolen. In a classic Law & Order twist, the true killer is revealed to be the actor/candidate's  "Devil Wears Prada" bride.

 

Gov. Romney's family ties to Billy the Kid

After receiving my first comment about the post concerning Gov. Mitt Romney's possibly familial ties to everyone's favorite Young Gun, Billy the Kid, I decided to do a little more digging on the Internets to clarify. The reference was not linked back to a source in the first post because the Wikipedia page that formerly provided the interesting, yet questionable, tidbit had been revised (the Romney blogging boys must have gotten to it). What is accurate on Wikipedia is up for debate, and the theory rests on William Henry Bonney being the real name of Billy the Kid. Genealogists have differing opinions. You decide.

Wikipedia on Billy the Kid:

Some genealogists say he was born William Henry Bonney and was son of William Harrison Bonney and wife Katherine Boujean, paternal grandson of Levi Bonney and wife Rhoda Pratt and great-grandson of Obadiah Pratt.

The breakdown:

William Henry Bonney's great grandfather was Obadiah Pratt. Gov. Romney's great great grandfather was Parley Parker Pratt. Parley Parker Pratt was the son of Jared Pratt. Jared Pratt was the son of Obadiah Pratt. Keeping track? Obadiah Pratt was Billy the Kid's great grandfather and  Obadiah Pratt was Governor Romney's great-great-great-great grandfather.

And people thought that polygamy was the most interesting part of Gov. Romney's family tree.

As the Vote Rocks: Will Gov. Romney claim his infamous relative? Will this distract voters from Sen. Clinton's relationship to a fugitive? Will the other crook in Gov. Romney's life be convicted? Stay tuned.

 

Cuba's Dead Man Endorsing

In a successful attempt to distract Americans from rumors on the Internets about his death, Fidel Castro referred to his own rumor that a Clinton/Obama ticket would be invincible:

Today, talk is about the seemingly invincible ticket that might be created with Hillary for President and Obama for Vice President.

While his comment about Clinton and Obama is not actually an endorsement, it definitely is the strongest statement I've ever heard from a dead person.

Castro's essay also praises President Carter, emasculates President Ford, ridicules President Eisenhower, illuminates his dealings with President Clinton, disparages President Bush (W), empathizes with former Vice President Gore, and critiques the American electoral system.

While some think it is remarkable that Castro has outlasted them all and others are astounded at the 97% voter turnout in Cuba, you have to take into account his version of democracy: there is only one political party; candidates have to be approved before running for office; public political opposition is not allowed; political dissidents are pursued by authorities; and nonvoters are blacklisted by the government.

Since reading Castro's essay I can not get the image of Che Guevera as a golf caddie out of my head. Castro's next piece should clarify his thoughts on the Che Guevera merchandising industrial complex. At $24.99 for a baseball cap and $14.99 a pop for t-shirts and belt buckles, Cuba's problems stemming from the embargo could have been eased by receiving a percentage of the profits.

As the Vote Rocks

A couple of days ago, a news producer asked my opinion on what was special about the upcoming presidential elections. I was having a bad day and without thinking gave a standard talking points answer - some nonsense about high voter turnout, a longer election cycle...blah, blah, blah. What I should have said was:

Like sands through the hourglass, so are the days of the 2008 elections...this is the first open presidential election in more than 50 years, we are fighting two wars on foreign soil; Democrats have the first viable woman, black, and Latino candidates; Republicans have a Mormon, a bona fide war hero, a cross-dressing former NYC Mayor, and maybe an actor; spouses include the one fighting cancer and her husband's battles, the actor's trophy wife, the vegan's trophy wife, and a former President ; the Mormon saves people in his free time, has five hot sons, and may even be related to Billy the Kid (really); the former NYC Mayor's kids don't like Daddy; the war hero's sons are serving in the military; a billionaire may put his hat in the ring; bloggers are uniting and conquering; Iran is building nukes; Fidel Castro is dead dying; campaign spending is likely to top a billion dollars, and even though all of the drama will be captured on YouTube for the next 15 months - the nominees will be decided sooner than ever before.

There has to be something inspiring in this ongoing soap opera that will get the 100 million nonvoters into a voting booth. Stay tuned...